Poor Borg! She was too little at the top and too big at the bottom, and around the middle— don’t tell anybody, but she resembled an overfed baby! … Most dejectedly she waddled beside Rosa until Bets took her by the hand and whispered, ‘Borg, you’ve got to girdle that girth.’ Bets knew what she was talking about. Whatever your body structure is, it is up to you to make your body as beautiful as possible.
“Her parents were really condemning her with that name.”
“It must be hard to be part of a civilization that travels space in a huge cube assimilating aliens, and ALSO have baby fat!!”
“Also, Bets is NOT a good friend.”
“Can you immediately unfriend someone after they say, ‘Girdle that girth’?”
“And the author tells us ‘not to tell anybody’ but then puts it into a fucking book? The shade!”
Excerpt from BuzzFeed article that had me rolling laughing! Woe betide you if you don’t laugh!